Household

Eva Solo Digital Kitchen Scale

$69 Amazon »

X marks the ounces. The pounds. The grams. And the milliliters in Eva Solo's contemporary Digital Kitchen Scale. The Danish design is a minimalist, yet eye-catching, take on standard food scales, with its bright red hue...

Black Bag Porcelain Vase

$109.90 Etsy »

This Black Bag Porcelain Vase is black. Deep, dark matte black, almost the same shade as my ex-girlfriend Karen's heart. (Almost. Hers is even more similar to that Black 3.0, Blackest Paint in the World Black.) So in...

LED Cube Chair

$119.99 Amazon »

Why, LED Cube Chair, you're glowing! ... Are you...pregnant?! No? Full of light, not life? Ah, well, you look beautiful either way...

Shark Bin Felt Laundry Basket

$177.94 Etsy »

And you thought your socks went missing before. Good luck getting any of them back from the Shark Bin. I heard he also likes dirty underwear, and I gotta think Crotchless Yoga Pants are up there too...

Cooking Guide Apron

$25.82 Amazon »

The Cooking Guide Apron was made for all the home chefs and recipe enthusiasts out there who...just can't keep track of how many ounces are in a cup, and how to tell if the steak has hit medium without sawing it open...

Elephant Keychain & Key Holder

$19.90 Amazon »

An elephant never forgets, and with this elephant neither will you. At least not when it comes to where you put your keys, since the elephant end of the Elephant Keychain nestles snugly inside a wall-mounted elephant...

Wireless Charging Nightstand with LED Lights

$129.99 Amazon »

Old Captain proves they are hip to modern times and tech with their wireless charging nightstand with built-in LED lights. Available in white or dark brown, the side table features a tempered glass top with wireless charging...

Japanese-Style Tempura Deep Fryer

$37.99 - $50 Amazon »

Tempura in the morning, tempura in the evening, tempura at suppertime / When you've got a Japanese-style deep fryer, you can have tempura anytime! Perhaps not the best song parody, but I was just considering whether I...

Dometic MoBar 550S Outdoor Mobile Bar Cart

$5,995.95 Williams Sonoma »

Dometic MoBar. It's short for Domestic Mother's Bar, but they changed the name so dads and dudes will want to use it. No, that's not it. OK, they changed it so it wouldn't be so obvious how bad domestic mothers need a...

ALLEX Super Hard Spring Loaded Scissors

$19.80 Amazon »

Super hard and spring loaded, that's ALLEX Scissors for ya. Hasn't changed a bit since high school, except for maybe bulking up here and there. Growing out of his safety blade into a burly, heavy-duty angled cutter. Replacing...

Fluicer Fold-Flat Juicer

$14.95 - $19.95 Dreamfarm »

The Fluicer is one of the latest handy designs, and fanciful portmanteau words, from Dreamfarm. In this case the portmanteau stems the words "flat" and "juicer," and the handiness from a juicer that provides increased...

Mud Scrubber Rubber Brush Mat

$21.99 Amazon »

Will the Mud Scrubber Rubber Brush Mat finally get my mama off my back about my feet? My feet that are only wet and muddy and covered with ice melt because I was out shoveling her sidewalk?...

Shaggy Duvet Cover

$49.99 - $69.99 Amazon »

The shaggy duvet cover. A little bedspread made of pure comfort, hygge, and dead animals...

ABLOY PL362 Padlock

$345 Amazon »

Wish I could put an ABLOY PL362 Padlock on all my valuables stored on the internet. Credit cards, online banking, home security camera feeds, password manager, PornHub viewing history. That last one mostly for my wife...

The Hybrid Cocktail Glass

$54.99 Amazon »

The Hybrid Cocktail Glass allows ye in need of a drink to measure, mix, and mmm mmm mmm down the hatch in a single vessel, without the mess of sweating tumblers, and without the buzzkill of taking sips of a watered-down...

Middle Finger Toilet Paper Holder

$119.99 Etsy »

Flipping the bird becomes much more than a cheap gesture with this Middle Finger Toilet Paper Holder. Instead, Pygmallionaire's 3D-printed and hand-painted metallic design is a functional luxury!...

SIFTR Can Strainer & Mini Colander

Sold Out Amazon »

The SIFTR Can Strainer & Mini Colander looks like it might work a little better than my method of straining the liquid out of canned goods, which is to place the jagged-edged lid of the opened can back inside it and smooooosh...

2-in-1 Dumpling Maker

$12.99 Amazon »

Dumplings are not on my list of DIY desires for the year - not when I have a papercraft Commodore 65 to build! But if anyone else out there (ahem, Mama) is interested in trying their hand at dumpling creation, this 2-in-1...

Imperatorworks IW-R1 Zero Gravity Office & Gaming Chair

$3,639 Amazon »

If your New Year's Resolution was to work harder...or play harder, the Imperatorworks IW-R1 Zero Gravity Office & Gaming Chair has you covered on both ends. The luxe workstation comes loaded with a bevy of features, ranging...

Hippo Catch-All Dish

$29.99 - $35.99 Amazon »

This hungry, hungry hippo is gonna help you, help you out by holding, holding all your keys, phones, wallets, candies and cough drops, and other small items. And despite being a hungry, hungry hippo, since he's made of...

Letter & Number Ice Molds

$22 - $54 Etsy »

Only thing that could make my Old Fashioned better is a big ol' "D" lookin' at me like, "Dude!" every time I take a sip. Well, gulp, really. Dry January is nowhere to be seen in my house in 2023, and given how fast I...

Octopus Banana Rug

$132.67 Etsy »

My doomsday prediction for 2023: the Octopus Bananas will come for us! And since we'll all be dead or enslaved, and unable to get merch and gear to remember it by, here's an Octopus Banana Rug you can buy before the Octo-Banana-pocalypse...

Snow Globe Spice Jars & Seasoning Shakers

$14.99 - $26.99 Amazon »

Let it snow (salt)! Let it snow (paprika)! Let it snow (chili flakes)! Even better if you've got the 4 seasons or some animal friends dancing around in your spice and seasoning snow while it's coming down...

AirScape Coffee Storage Canister

$27.90 - $41 Amazon »

Kick back and take in the landscape with a cup of AirScape. Or rather, a cup of coffee brewed from beans and grounds stored in air- and humidity-impenetrable AirScape Storage Canister...