Entertainment

Vurtego V4 Pro - Air-Powered Adult Pogo Stick

$383.54 Amazon »

The Vurtego V4 Pro is one of the few kinds of bouncy, bouncy this dude would never touch. First of all, the air-powered adult pogo stick is designed with an 11+-foot vertical, and as Blood, Sweat & Tears kindly reminds...

Cashmere Hammer Rattle

$32.72 Etsy »

I've met my fair share of Velvet Hammers in my day (pretty sure I even married one) but this is the first Cashmere Hammer that's crossed my path. Too bad it's a rattle for kids, and would be completely preposterous for...

Swimming Poo - A Video Game Full of Crap

Swimming Poo's STEAM blurb describes it as "a humorous action game," but that's about as full of crap as Swimming Poo itself. Humorous? If your favorite jokes start with "Pull my finger," or "So I was taking a dump the...

Carbon Fiber Folding Chess, Checkers & Backgammon Set

$64.98 Amazon »

Well, really it's a carbon fiber-ish folding chess, checkers & backgammon set. The game is made of MDF, but has a "carbon fiber tech material veneer." So not solid carbon fiber, and even the supposed-to-be-carbon-fiber...

The World's Most Fiendishly Difficult Literary Puzzle

$10.39 Amazon »

Edward Powys Mathers (aka Torquemada) wrote Cain's Jawbone in 1934, and to this day, only 3 people have ever solved the 6 murder mysteries hidden within its hundred pages. So, nope, calling it The World's Most Fiendishly...

Indo Trick Trampoline Scooter

$49.95 - $119.95 Amazon »

Tramp not included. The Indo Trick Trampoline Scooter is a wheelless board-and-bar design made to help scoot enthusiasts practice freestyle tricks, plus come up with new ones. I'd say it's a safer way to learn Triple...

Jumbo Star Wars Millennium Falcon Crayon

$3.90 Amazon »

Who'd-a thought this piece of junk could clean up so well? The Jumbo Star Wars Millennium Falcon Crayon splashes every color of the rainbow - or at least every color in your standard box of Crayolas - over the dismal...

Brompton A Line Folding Bike

$1,150 Amazon »

The Brompton A Line Folding Bike has nailed it. That's exactly what I want to do at work all day too: curl up in the fetal position under my desk until it's time to go home. At which point I will unfurl like a beautiful...

How Not to Be Helpful

$11.95 Amazon »

I don't think many people really need JJ Harlan's How Not to Be Helpful: An Illustrated Guide for Thoughtless Adults. With the exception of my mama and, like, Keanu Reeves, most of us have already got it down pat. But...

Critical Thinking Cards Deck

Ah, critical thinking. Not an activity many of us are keen to partake in these days. Or at least, that's what the media, politicians, and advertisers hope. The Critical Thinking Cards Deck is a more compact and party...

100 Games to Play with a Stick

$14 Amazon »

No, 100 Games to Play with a Stick is not about your penis. But, like your penis, it does make a great gag gift...

Automatic Domino Train Set

$43.99 Amazon »

Letting an Automatic Domino Train build all your kids' domino runs for them prevents them from practicing key physical and mental skills. Hand-eye coordination. Visual perception. Problem-solving. Concentration. Patience...

The Bartender's Manifesto

$18.39 Amazon »

Whoa. Check out The Bartender's Manifesto's Guide to Citrus Garnish Styles section. I am amazed. Not only at the number of citrus garnish styles in existence, but also in how this manual of How to Think, Drink, and Create...

A Book For a C*nt

$12.72 Etsy »

I like how right underneath the A Book For a C*nt heading in its Etsy listing, there's the denotation that this product is a "Bestseller." Ha! I guess everyone has a c*unt in their life they need to buy A Book For a C*nt...

Vintage Bookshelf Board Games

$39.95 - $439 Amazon »

These Vintage Bookshelf Board Games from WS Game Company are, to quote the late, great Chris Farley, awesome! I mean, have a gander yourself. Vintage Monopoly folded and packed up all tidy to look like a book: awesome!...

Third Assist Vintage-Style Hockey Gloves

$89 - $129 Third Assist »

Third Assist's vintage-style hockey gloves could eliminate fights in the sport. Because who's ever gonna wanna take these sweet throwback gloves off? I wouldn't. Even to punch some a-hole's teeth out...

Sculpd Pottery Kits

$65 Amazon »

The ghost of Patrick Swayze not included. Sculpd Pottery Kits are beginner-level boxes of all the (probably very messy) goods you'll need to sculpt, carve, paint, and varnish your own clay masterpieces. ... Or at least...

No F*cks Given: Naughty Words to Live By

$16.79 Amazon »

Sarah Knight brings all her F*cks together in No F*cks Given: Naughty Words to Live By. The book is a compilation of the "no-bullsh*t, life-changing advice" she offers in her 5 previous F*ck-filled books: The Life-Changing...

mountainFLOW Biodegradable Ski & Snowboard Wax

$20 Amazon »

Hit the slopes, without ruining them, with mountainFLOW biodegradable ski and snowboard wax. Deemed safe "for both the user and the environment," mountainFLOW is a plant-based wax that contains no petroleum, the active...

How To Talk to Small People Calendar

$17.87 Etsy »

I get that the How To Talk to Small People Calendar is a joke, but...I don't think I quite get the joke. Is this 12-month demonstration of squatting down, hoisting up, holding sideways, hanging upside down, and harnessing...

Nite Ize SlapLit LED Slap Wrap

$11.19 - $15.99 Amazon »

Neon colors that glow even brighter with LEDs. Haphazard criss-crossy line design. Slap bracelet functionality. The Nite Ize SlapLit LED Slap Wrap is 1990s safety and visibility at your service! Don't forget the braided...

Pelican Marine Series Waterproof Floating Phone Pouch

$24.99 - $29.99 Amazon »

The Pelican Marine Series Waterproof Floating Phone Pouch is available in Olive Green, Stealth Black, and - are you ready, Mama? - Garden Party Blue. Flowered, feminine, and perfect for all the times you drop your phone...

Tell Me Without Telling Me Game

$19.89 Amazon »

"Tell me without telling me..." You've seen the prompt - the "game," I suppose - on Reddit, TikTok, Twitter, whatever other social media platforms the cool cats are using and this dude is trying to get rid of these days...

Goblies Play Paint Goo for Water Guns

$10.50 Amazon »

Goblies Play Paint Goo Play Paint Goo-ifies any squirt gun or water blaster. The tubs o' fun are filled with colorful and tactile substances that will enhance any water battle and - good news for the parents dealing with...