Lightload Survival Tool Towels
/lightload-survival-tool-towels-24861.jpg "Lightload Survival Tool Towels")
Lightload claims theirs are the "only towels that are survival tools!" So like, for when you're on a third date with She-Ra: Princess of Power, and the waiter asks how spicy you want your Jungle Curry, and you say, "5 stars!" to impress her, and then can't stop sweating or making "Haaaahhhh!" sounds for the next 2 hours? So you'll have a 0.6-ounce Lightload disc in your pocket to slip out and use to dab yourself off, maybe even wrap around your head, so she won't go running far, far away from your geyser-glanded self?
No, not so much?
Lightload Towels are certainly towels by nature, and their viscose construction will absorb water from rains and swims, and sweat from workouts and hot peppers. And they'll do it even better, the company says, than cotton and microfiber. But Lightload's true survivalist nature extends to their applications in the wild. If you're not drying off, you can use your Lightload as a wash cloth, a fire starter, a first aid supplement, a diaper, an insulator, or a mask. The wickable fabric will also keep you both dry and warm during active pursuits in cold weather.
Each compacted Lightload is packaged in a waterproof wrap to ensure the cloth stays clean and dry for hygiene or first aid use. Opened, the towels can absorb up to 9 times their weight in water, and begin softening and unfurling as soon as you start dampening them. They are reusable; Lightload says, "They last until they don't.
The Lightload listing here is for a 3-pack, primed and ready to stuff a few stockings.
DudeIWantThat.com is reader-supported. When you buy through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases. Learn more.
/human-burrito-blanket-29171.jpg "Human Burrito Blanket")
Human Burrito Blanket
A couple of giant Human Burrito Blankets will make sure your Tortilla Baby knows who Mommy and Daddy are. At 5' in diameter, I'd be able to roll up one fine bean, cheese, rice, and man meat burrito in this flour tortilla...
Sand-Free Beach Mat
I would like it very much if CGear's Sand-Free Multimat stayed sand-free by emitting an invisible dome barrier that repelled...no, forcefully rejected all granular compounds...and children...that got within a foot of...
Dude Wipes
Dude Wipes: A Brief Overview of Audience and Application. Dude Wipes are for dudes. And every once in while--say, every 18 to 24 hours--dudes tend to have an especially...explosive...encounter with the bathroom. The kind...
/fuzzy-ball-instant-dry-hand-60930.jpg?mode=crop "Fuzzy Ball Instant-Dry Hand Towels")
Fuzzy Ball Instant-Dry Hand Towels
These Fuzzy Ball Towels look more like what I'd use to suds up and wash my body than to dry it almost instantly. But I guess they have magical microfiber properties that suck up water with a quickness, and also their...
Jedi Bathrobe
I bet this is the only bathrobe on Amazon--no, on the planet!--that has 121 customer reviews! 121 reviews! 159 if you count its second listing here. 159 reviews*! Of a bathrobe. I know it's a Jedi bathrobe and it has...
2-Person Canopy Barrel Sauna
Ahhh, a sauna that I don't have to share with half a dozen other sprawled out and sweaty dudes at the gym (dudes who, counterintuitively to the entire point of a sauna, insist on playing games and music on their phones...
/towelmaid-outdoor-towel-pool-60571.jpg?mode=crop "TowelMaid Outdoor Towel & Pool Toy Storage Racks")
TowelMaid Outdoor Towel & Pool Toy Storage Racks
A TowelMaid outdoor towel and pool toy storage rack may not be very exciting in and of itself, but what a TowelMaid indicates - that you have outdoor towels and pool toys that need to be stored, because you actually have...
/reversible-flour-sack-kitchen-60863.jpg?mode=crop "Reversible Flour Sack Kitchen Towels")
Reversible Flour Sack Kitchen Towels
Not that I'm a Level 10 expert on kitchen towels and dish towels and the like, but these Reversible Flour Sack Kitchen Towels are hands down the best kitchen towels and dish towels and the like that I've ever used. And...
/armpit-air-conditioners-23157.jpg?mode=crop "Armpit Air Conditioners")
Armpit Air Conditioners
They say Summer Is Coming. And not six, 10-episode seasons from now. Like, next week. The Plains, Midwest, and South can expect scorching temperatures, stifling humidity, and lots and lots of armpit sweat...
G2 Turbo - Wearable Fan for Back(pack) Sweat
Part of me hopes the Presti G2 Turbo becomes the Little Crowdfunding Project That Could. Because I just saw The Goonies on cable for the 400th time, and this aerator of back sweat - what inventor Edwin Wang calls the...
The Boob Scarf
Breast enhancement surgery is a major decision every 16 year old girl has to make for herself. Why not give the new look a trial run first while at the very same time keeping your neck warm? Don't think that's possible?...
/desk-chair-wrap-56161.jpg?mode=crop "Desk Chair Wrap")
Desk Chair Wrap
It's getting to be that time of year. When the weather turns and desk chairs start getting cold. Perpetually. With ice blocks for hands and feet, no matter how high they insist you jack up the thermostat. No matter how...