Game of Thrones Sigil Cookie Cutters

$5.50 - $23 Etsy »

Honey-spiced locusts from A Feast of Ice and Fire's Essos chapter may be a more authentic dessert to serve at your next Game of Thrones viewing party, but...ew. That sounds disgusting. Aren't locusts bugs? People from...

Nighttime Poison/Morning Antidote Coasters

$14.99 55 Hi's »

55 Hi's has already given us birthday cards that double as origami shot glasses. Now the paper virtuosos have some ideas for friendly--and not so friendly--potions to fill them with. One side of the Pick Your Poison coaster...

LEGO Taxidermy Deer Kit

$28 David Cole »

Unlike the Grizzly Robotic Utility Vehicle, this nugget of LEGO taxidermy would be way cooler if it were bigger. When I first saw it I thought it was a life-size LEGO deer head and I was like, "Yahtzee! Cornelius is gonna...

Grizzly Robotic Utility Vehicle

Maybe the coolest thing about the Grizzly Robotic Utility Vehicle is that it's smaller than it looks. Like, I could sit on it and make it drive me around, profiting from its design as an all-electric workhorse with the...

Polar Bear Ice Tray

$19.78 Amazon »

Not only is a polar bear ice cube tray adorable and perfect for assuaging the injuries of children who hurt themselves doing something stupid that you told them not to, but the design itself is also highly utilitarian...

STACT Modular Wine Wall

$129.99 - $149.99 STACT »

Any wall-mounted apparatus that holds the juice of the gods and resembles the Pachinko game from The Price Is Right earns high marks on my scrutinizing scorecard of things I encounter in life. Fabricated from aircraft-grade...

Spicebomb Cologne

$61.56 - $82.26 Amazon »

To me, the idea of smelling like a bomb of anything connotes an unpleasantly strong and cloying odor, and when I think of a bomb of spices all that comes to mind are the scents that permeate my clothes, my hair, my skin...

Photon 3D Scanner

$579 Matterform »

Matterform's Photon caters to people who want to get in on the 3D printing action, but have no existing computer modeling skills, and no desire to acquire any. A desktop-sized 3D scanner, the Photon will convert any physical...

Dog Shelter BBQ Finder App

Are you having trouble finding the very best dog shelter BBQs in your area? Well sharpen your steak knife and bow-wow your head to say grace because the same people who brought you The Funloving Feminist's Bible have...

Boregasm Pills

Good thing yawns and O faces look about the same because, thanks to research being conducted by a handful of (presumably exhausted and horny) PhD students at Indiana University's The Kinsey Institute, they're about to...

The Baby Muzzle

$149.99 Japan Trend Shop »

First we saw the Japanese Shouting Vase, an ABS resin stress-reliever that mutes the wails of angry or frustrated souls who need to unleash their fury without disturbing the peace. Now the brilliant minds of Japan--perhaps...

Big Wooly Balls Rugs

$11,500 MYK »

And I thought the giant grizzly bear hide would be the most wondrous piece of ursine-themed home decor I saw all week. This rug from Berlin textile firm MYK, though, isn't just big and bear-y, it's made out of fun wooly...

Automatic - Your Driving Wingman

Sold Out Amazon »

The Automatic smartphone app had me at "always remembers where you parked your car." That alone is going to save me at least 4 hours a week. Its suggestions on speed and braking adjustments to increase gas mileage, instant...

World's Best Cookie Dunking Cup

Do we really need a milk cup ergonomically designed to fit all basic sandwich cookies such that every dunk is a good dunk? Uh, are bears Catholic? Does the Pope shit in the woods? Hell yeah we need The Cookie Dunker...

3D Printed Antler Switchplate

Discontinued

It's a toss up which I like more: killing bucks or killing the lights. Both carry potentially high returns. If you know what I mean. So thanks very much to Pixil 3D for creating an antler switchplate that will enable...

Coffee & Cigs - Addictive Molecules Tie

Discontinued

Are your vices suffocating you, or do you wear them proudly as a badge of This is how I am, take it or leave it? In either case, if coffee consumption and cig sucking play important roles in your life, a necktie printed...

Bacon Condoms

$9.99 Bacon Salt »

Bill Gates, you put out an open call. You asked for the "next generation" in condoms. A design that will revolutionize safe sex practices by making the peen sheaths more desirable to wear. Men and birth control in third...

Gogo Elite Blow-up Tent

Discontinued

A tent that sets up in 15 seconds by way of human lung power and compacts to a size small enough to stuff into a water bottle when not in use. What egghead thought of this? Whomever you are, how's about heading over to...

Sound-Activated EL Wire Bra

$59.97 - $109.97 Amazon »

Leave no sense unturned with these sound-activated neon EL bras. Except maybe taste. And smell. Revision: leave none of the important senses unturned with these sound-activated neon EL bras. Their battery-operated wire...

The Batmobile Jr.

Motor trike. Until about 3 seconds ago that term seemingly would have referred to something incredibly lame, wouldn't it? Especially when used in tandem with descriptors such as "electric vehicle" and "eco-friendly"...

Crocheted Optimus Prime Helmet

Discontinued

My grandma used to crochet me things. Yeah, used to. Like she used to make me waffles from scratch. Then she got lazy and just hoped I wouldn't notice when she started replacing the once bountiful discs cratered with...

Strong Like Bull Magnets

My friend DeAndre ran with the bulls in Pamplona once, and he assures me that the expression "strong like bull" is no, well, no bullshit. People get impaled and tossed and stampeded and DeAndre saw one guy take a horn...

Himalayan Salt Skull Lamp

Discontinued

They can make a lamp out of salt? That's crazy! I'm Brian Fellow!* And this Himalayan salt skull lamp is Henry! No, seriously. The Spice of Light already named the lamp. That kind of sucks. So now if I buy it it'll be...

Henty Wingman Suit Commuter Bag

Sold Out Amazon »

This Goose protects suits from wrinkles and creases, totes tablets, and staves off the rain. Provided you don't fall off your bike or back into something while walking and kill him too. The Henty Wingman, a heavy-duty...