Robot Lamp Candle & Wax Melts Warmer

Discontinued

Now I don't know how many people out there who are into candles and wax melts and aromatherapy are also into robots, but if that's your demographic, my dudes and ladies, have I got a Robot Lamp Candle & Wax Melts Warmer...

Stack-O-Lantern Pumpkin Stacking Kit

Discontinued

These jacks are stacked. The Stack-O-Lantern Pumpkin Stacking Kit invites dudes and ladies young and old to "up your pumpkin display to another level" with their 8-piece set of pumpkin carving tools and jack-o-lantern...

Module Concrete Pens & Pencil

$80 - $150 IntoConcrete »

Need a concrete answer? Want to give someone a hard No? Write your requests and responses with a Module concrete pen or pencil from 22STUDIO. The writing tools come in 3 Module styles, Rollerball Pen, Fountain Pen, and...

Crags Magnetic Putty

$19.95 Speks »

These ferrite magnetic stones are like putty in your hands. At least if the name "Crags Magnetic Putty" is to be believed. A cross between silly putty and Micromagnets, this "oddly satisfying" fidget toy consists of over...

Outrider Coyote Adaptive 4WD ATV

$13,800 Outrider »

In addition to deeming it "the World's Lightest 4WD off-road machine," Outrider specifically built their Coyote 4WD ATV "for able-bodied and disabled riders alike." The robust and burly vehicle has adaptive design options...

LINNER Nova Bluetooth Hearing Aids for Talk & TV

$179 - $219 LINNER »

Most Bluetooth earbuds help dudes and ladies tune the world out, but LINNER's Nova Bluetooth earbuds help them tune it in. The LINNER Nova is a set of Bluetooth hearing aids that enhance and filter the sounds of voices...

Turtle Shell Hat

$164 Etsy »

If you're in the market for a low-key Super Mario Bros. group costume this Halloween, have I got a Turtle Shell Hat for you...

The Garbage Pail Kids Cookbook

$11.69 Amazon »

The Garbage Pail Kids Cookbook is on its way to win the hearts and destroy the kitchens of all the Messy Jesses and Messy Tessies out there. I believe the 35+ recipes it contains are even edible!...

All About the Benjamins Bathrobe

$75.65 Etsy »

How much do you think the All About the Benjamins Bathrobe costs? At printing, it was $75.65. I know, right? A completely lost marketing opportunity and way to make an extra $24.35 per sale!...

Miracle Melting Witch - Melts Again & Again

$19.99 Amazon »

The Miracle Melting Witch will get you, my pretty...or at least she'll say she'll get you, my pretty, as she melts down into a green-and-black blob with a broomstick again and again...

Tear Stick to Make Yourself Cry

$22 Amazon »

When applied to the rims of the eyelids, the Kryolan Tear Stick generates big fat ones for the likes of actors, drama queens, and people who believe crying will get them out of speeding tickets, or into sold out shows...

RIFT Carbon Campers

$29k - $39k RIFT »

Big may be beautiful, but when it comes to RIFT Carbon Campers, under 500 pounds is lookin' pretty good too. Thanks to a carbon fiber shell over a powder-coated aluminum frame, and a 61-pound tongue weight, the RIFT Utility...

Sword Cuff Bracelet

$139.90 Etsy »

Normally, a great warrior wouldn't want to see his sword blade bent and wrapped into a big "O." But in the case of this Sword Cuff Bracelet from Osiris Jewelry, I think, whether viking, medieval knight, or Geralt of Rivia...

The Groaning Blobfish

$13.44 Amazon »

Uhhh, I have to get up. Uhhh, I have to go to work. Uhhh, I have to paint my mama's bathroom. Uhhh, I have to eat a meal with my in-laws and uhhhhhhhhh my Aunt Jan. Ain't nobody in need of a Groaning Blobfish more than...

The Pet Nugget

$8.95 - $10.15 Etsy »

Here's a lil' Pet Nugget to remind your lil' pet nugget you love them. Or to make them crave a 6-piece of real McNuggets all day long after you guilt them into keeping the taunting figurine on their desktop or dashboard...

7-Eleven Crocs

$50 - $100 Crocs »

The latest sign of the apocalypse? Yes, 7-Eleven Crocs, but not just 7-Eleven Crocs. 7-Eleven Crocs plus the fact that this is the second pair of cloggin' crocs I've written about in the span of a week! In - as the mastermind...

Fleece Fitted Mattress Cover

Sold Out Amazon »

Wow. You gotta be one cold woman to want to sleep on top of a mattress cover made of fleece. I'm not talking cold in the soul like my ex-girlfriend Karen. I'm talking cold in the toes that feel like ice cubes in a torture...

The Not For Climbing Spring-Free Titanium Carabiner

$30 - $36 Kickstarter »

Design The Everything isn't messing around with The "Not For Climbing" Titanium Carabiner. Neither in their nifty spring-free, pin-free design that uses flexure to open, close, and bounce the carabiner back to its original...

Barbie & Ken in a Box Couples' Costumes

Discontinued

And if you need the other half of this Barbie & Ken in a Box Couples' Costumes, go ahead and at Margot Robbie or Ryan Gosling to see if they're down...

Yukon Glory Burger Serving Set

$49.99 Amazon »

The Yukon Glory Burger Serving Set, it's an extravagance, indeed, but a fat-beef-patty-with-melty-cheese extravagance well worth it when you need a gift for your favorite foodie, or your favorite Dad. Yukon Glory has...

Personalized Family Crest Ring

$2,750 Etsy »

I'll pass on wearing my heart on my sleeve, but my family honor on my finger? Yes please, pass me a Personalized Family Crest Ring...

Halloween Broomstick Snack & Appetizer Stand

Discontinued

Don't be a broomstick in the mud, dudes, this Halloween Broomstick Snack & Appetizer Stand is a real clever and charming way to display spooky season treats. And even if you don't want one, it would make a fine gift for...

Yoga for the Inflexible Male

$15.81 Amazon »

Yoga for the Inflexible Male is funny, but it's no joke. Written by Yoga Matt (yuk, yuk, yuk) the book provides 3 dude-specific yoga practices, designated as such by their attention to men who can't even bend over and...

E161: What Is This Thing?

Sold Out Amazon »

Welcome to Edition 161 of What Is This Thing?, my recurring visual riddle series consisting of one simple photo - see above - and one simple question: what is this thing?...