Household

Readyman Hostage Escape Credit Card

$13 Readyman »

This is all of course presuming you get to keep your wallet after you've been taken hostage. And that you can maneuver your cuffed, roped, or zip-tied hands inside it to grab Readyman's credit card of escape tools. Oh...

Dino Bioluminescent Plankton Sphere

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If you're too mature to display BioPop's Dino Pet on your desk...or just frustrated that your kids keep stealing it...here's a more sophisticated objet d'art containing the same glowing blue dinoflagellates. If you haven't...

Chef'n Cob Corn Stripper

$7.50 Amazon »

This Cob Corn Stripper (not to be confused with a lady in a cornfield on a Hitch 'Er Up Stripper Pole) better work damn good, and without making a mess, because despite my rant last week about breaking up ground beef...

The Eve Mattress

$549 - $999 Amazon »

Neither a mail-order mattress, nor a mattress-in-a-box, nor a relatively cheap mattress sounds like it would pair well with a good night's sleep. Still, the makers of Eve promise their 3-layer technology will deliver...

3D Door Wraps

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What's behind Door #3? Who cares? I'm more interested in the gateway to Renaissance Italy that's in front of it. You can keep your endless cascade of entryways over rickety wood floors though, Windowpix. That American...

Pop-Up Kitchen & Desktop Outlets

$27.99 Amazon »

So rarely when I have a problem--say, needing an extra electrical outlet--does the solution just pop up out of nowhere. But oh boy could I make that happen all the time with this set of countertop-embedded sockets...

Motorcycle Chain Ashtray

$16.95 Amazon »

For those who still haven't secured a Father's Day Gift yet, this Motorcycle Chain Ashtray and Amazon Prime shipping could be the last lifeline between you and having to leave the house and go to a store in person to...

Tungsten Sphere

$674.99 Amazon »

I'd call the Tungsten Sphere a desktop toy, but given its high density - at just about 2" in diameter the sphere weighs over 3 pounds - I'm not sure how much fiddling or stress-relieving palm rolls you'll be able to do...

The Duchess Gaming & Dining Table

Playing board games and sharing a meal seem like two of the very few activities people of all ages still like to do that involve, real, face-to-face, technology-free human interaction*. And BoardGameTables.com is doing...

Bloody Mary Diagram Glassware

Alyson Thomas is an artist. But she used to be an attorney. So presumably she knows the value of a good, stiff drink made right. Her Bloody Mary Diagram glasses give a shoutout to all of you who worked (i.e., partied)...

Ground Meat Chopper

$9.88 Amazon »

Since any idiot can cook ground beef crumbles on the stovetop, my girlfriend often makes me do it when she's making chili or bolognaise sauce. And then goes all Meat Chunk Police on me, tossing out comments about how...

Stone Forest Natural Bathtub

Stone Forest calls their bathtub "Natural" for its raw design, a rugged just-rolled-down-the-mountain aesthetic, rather than the precision-cut and polished-to-cold-industrial-modernity one we might expect from this type...

Real Partial T-Rex Skeleton

$2.39 million Theropoda »

Meet Roosevelt. Your new pet T-Rex. Sure, he passed away a little while ago, and his remains have kinda been Frankensteined together from 3 different specimens, and his skeleton and skull are still only about 45% complete--oh...

FoldiMate Robotic Laundry Folder

$700 - $850 FoldiMate »

Really? Really?! Am I so lazy that I'm willing to spend $800 on a machine that will fold my laundry? Pssshhh! I don't think so...

Automatic Toothpaste Dispenser & Holder

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It's not that I'm lazy (well, I am, but that's not why I want an automatic toothpaste dispenser) it's that no matter how diligent I am my toothpaste always devolves into a lumpy tube of wasted product with nasty, gummy...

Meat Shredding Claws

$19.75 Amazon »

Second only to my teeth--and probably preferred by the other people at the BBQ--these Claws from OXO shred meat with quickness, efficiency, and panache. Well, as much panache as an eagle's talons or a coupla garden rakes...

Yomo Simple Sushi Maker

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People always talk about sushi making as this formidable, elusive craft that many have tried, but all but the most elite and Jiro-Ono-blessed have failed to execute well. And while I basically agree with this assessment...

Geizeer Ice Cube Air Conditioner

$119 - $129 Geizeer »

Make that "Geizeer Super Cheap and Eco-Friendly Ice Cube Air Conditioner." (And it's actually pronounced "Guy-zer," not "Gee-zer," even though in my head it will always be the latter.) At an operational cost of less than...

The Fortress Luxury Safe

$128,800 Doettling »

I sure hope German safe manufacturer Doettling's Fortress lives up to its "safest luxury safe in the world" claims because there's no way any owner of one is going to be able to keep it hidden, discreet, or installed...

A Hole Paperweight

Happy Father's Day, old man. Remember all those times you told me how when you found out Mom was pregnant with me you said you needed another kid like you needed a hole in the head? And then after I was born, and as I...

Q*Bert Desk Organizer

Oh @!#?@! Where'd I put my pen? Did I lose those scissors again? Dave Delisle, whose THOR Hammer Tool Kit you just saw here, has also birthed this Q*Bert Desk Organizer brainchild...

BloodStop Hemostatic Gauze

$16.99 Amazon »

"I dare you." "Hey dude, watch this." "Wanna try to make some money on YouTube?" These are just a few of the calling cards leading to one's introduction to BloodStop, a hemostatic gauze that adheres to spewing wounds...

Indoor/Outdoor Wi-Fi Enabled Ceiling Fan

$744 Amazon »

A heavy breeze with a side of efficiency. The Haiku L Series ceiling fan suits seekers of airflow indoors and out, as well as both the remote control faithfuls and the app-happy who can't put their smartphones down for...

Fleshlight's Sleeve Warmer (NSFW)

$29.95 Amazon »

Wait, so there's an alternative to just blowing in it first? This cutting-edge piece of technology from Fleshlight may look like a sex toy for your girlfriend, but it's actually a pleasure enhancement tool for you. The...