Gifts For House Warming

I don't understand why I have to buy people a gift when they buy a house. To warm it of all things! If they have enough money to purchase a house, shouldn't they have enough money to warm it themselves? And if they don't, shouldn't they maybe have gone for something a little smaller and more practical? I think the default housewarming gift from now on should be an online seminar about living within one's means. Or, for those of you who want to be invited back to the home of the housewarmee, one of the slightly less judgmental items below.