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The Dadbag Beer Belly Fanny Pack

Posted: September 19, 2017
The Dadbag
$11.99
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The Dadbag beer belly fanny pack is right up there with the Sexy Chest Swimsuit in its ability to create a fiesta of discomfort, with a few streamers of sick fascination, before my eyes. The Baby Head Masks used to do it too, but I've been looking at those things for over 4 years now. It almost surprises me more when I see a baby that doesn't have a 500% scaled head and a Disgusted, Happy, or Cry expression.

But the Dadbag might top both of those disturbing oddities because it adds a layer of practicality to the design. As a functional fanny pack, you're not limited to the beach / YMCA pool and costume parties to make logical and appropriate use of your hairy gut. With a zippered pouch large enough to hold your keys, wallet, phone, a can of beer, and other EDC necessities, the Dadbag has the useful longevity to hit the office in the morning, happy hour at 5, and then dinner with your gf's parents later that night.

The only downside to the Dadbag that I can see is that you can't buy it yet. At printing, designer Albert Pukies (fitting name) was looking for production partners, since he knows once the world gets a load of these hot, hairy, puckered, flabby, and sunburned paunch pouches (he's got a whole line of Dadbags, not just the single bowl of jelly you see above) there's no way he's going to be able to keep up with orders on his own.

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