BedBunker Safes

Posted: October 09, 2012
Queen BedBunker Safe
$3,150 - $6,680
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Do you know, BedBunker, how long it's taken me to find an acceptably secure and clandestine means of stashing my mint condition Transformers and GI Joes? Do you know how many potential thieves I've had to ward off, or have my mom beat up for me? But now. Now! My retirement will not only be hidden, 2-hour fire rated, and impenetrable, but also nestled snugly into bed with me every single night. What do you call something too good to be true that is in fact true? A gift made just for me by the Baby Jesus? Well, thank you, Baby Jesus, and thank you, BedBunker for being his earthbound fabricator.

BedBunkers provide comprehensive hidden protection for valuables, particularly firearms and family jewels. But I bet people with a lot of drugs, and a lot of money earned from the peddling of drugs, will like them too. Safes are available in sizes Twin through California King, as well as Queen and King conversion kits that allow the single, Twin-sized safe to adapt to fit larger mattresses. Queen safes (double bins) run $5,470, and constitute 1,300 pounds of 10-gauge steel fitted with 1/4" thick, 140-pound steel-hinged doors. They measure 78" x 60" x 14" total. All BedBunkers are guaranteed for life, and look even more badass and ready for the Zombie Apocalypse when covered with this set of bed sheets.

Muchas danke to HiConsumption.

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