Fully Stocked Swiss Bank Safe

Posted: January 03, 2014
Fully Stocked Swiss Bank Safe

Here's a Swiss bank safe for you to put in your living room. Or your back yard. Your secret catacombs? Somewhere roomy, guarded, and secure, because one thing's for sure: the vault's self-contained 1,619 safe deposit boxes definitely are not going to fit in yours. Neither will its literal money pit filled with Swiss 5 centime (or Rappen, if you prefer the German) coins. The asking price for this extraordinary lot is rumored to be negotiable, but given that the 73.2' long x 7.2' high x 1.8' wide safe contains 8 million shiny bits of currency worth around $443,772, it's a good bet they won't take less than $443,773.

The safe, currently located in Basel, Switzerland, but willing to relocate for the right suitor, is a 1912 original from the former Schweizer Volksbank. It earned some Stick It to the Man notoriety in October 2013 when Swiss activist group Generation Basic Income Initiative dumped its contents in front of the Swiss parliament building as part of a campaign to set a fair base monthly income for all Swiss citizens. (The number of coins inside mirror the Swiss population). I don't know how heavily the demonstration made their politicians' hearts bleed--or how they managed to keep their politicians from scooping up all the cash and running back inside--but pending the vault's sale to some international Daddy Warbucks, the Initiative plans to use monies raised to take their message worldwide.

A piece of craftmanship, a piece of historical social commentary, and piece of massive booty, the Swiss bank safe will make anyone with the millions and millions of dollars it will surely cost to acquire it a real standout in the collector's world. Imagine having a game night in that thing. Please come to my private bank vault at 8 p.m. to play Settlers of Catan and maybe Cards Against Humanity. Winner will receive a 4-gallon bucket of Swiss centimes. Loser will be locked in vault overnight with my horny proboscis monkey, Wilbur.

All 1,612 safe deposit boxes have accompanying keys. The storage containers were handmade from steel and brass. The vault also features marble plinth elements.

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