Dude's Must See Products of 2023

Crack open a cold one, unleash the Kraken, and get the party started. Or, if you're lookin' to really tie one on, don't crack open the cold one, unleash the Krak'in, and turn the party into a rager. The Krak'in 2.0 is a beer shotgunning tool you can take anywhere, and pierce into any size can to make yourself an impromptu personal beer bong whenever the mood strikes.

Havashot at the Pavashot PenShot, and sendashot towards a human or animal attacker up to 30' away. The launching of Pavashot's proprietary PAVA aerosol powder will even expose a jagged-edged ring at the end of the self defense pen you can use for follow-up activities, such as glass breaking and eye gouging.

And when you're not PenShotting off its pepper spray alternative, you can use the Fisher Space Pen ink cartridge inside for PenningShot a note to your mama, or filling out the PowerBall ticket that will surely win you enough cash to hire a professional security team that will carry and use PenShots for you.

You dudes and ladies gotten a load - or a whiff - of Chazz Genitalia-Flavored Kettle Chips yet? They're available in both D*ck and Pus*y flavors, but (oddly? obviously?) not a mixed bag of both. And though you probably already know how at least one of them tastes, I will provide you with Lithuanian brand Chazz's description anyway:

"Regarding the TASTE: the taste of both Pus*y and D*ck chips is extremely good, and many who have tasted them will like them."

I'll fold him and hold him and flatten him...and kiss him and love him and squeeze him and call him George. No! I'll call him Grab Shell. The morphing keyboard you can lift and grip to type, or lay flat, in 3 separate segments, and arrange how you like on your desk.

The Grab Shell Keyboard is the brainchild of a coder, a hardware engineer, and a writer, each with slightly different typing needs that traditional keyboards weren't meeting. They also considered their gaming children in the Grab Shell design, kids who grow up using keyboards both for communication, and as controllers in video game, AR, and VR worlds. The device they came up with combines keys, a trackball, a joystick, a scroll wheel, and a toggle switch in a transformable way that better suits all of their needs.

Bwoooaaahhhzzzzz! Zzzhhwooom! That's the hum of a Seagate Lightsaber Collection FireCuda SSD igniting, and thrashing up to 7300MB/s of Darth Vader, Luke Skywalker, or Obi-Wan Kenobi-backed speed at your PC.

A Special Edition and officially licensed piece of Star Wars merch, Seagate's Lightsaber Collection FireCuda PCIe Gen4 NVMe SSD launches with 3 iconic lightsaber faceplates, and RGB lighting to bring "a galaxy of atmosphere to your drive." Even better, the faceplates are swappable, and the lighting customizable, so you switch between the Light Side and the Dark Side, the old wise ones and the young whippersnapper, according to your mood. That is, according to how you've fared in your work, gaming, and online dating lives that day.

VanLab says their Campervan Conversion Kits are DIY start to finish, and "If you can put together other flat-pack furniture then you can definitely do this, it's literally just screws...." Just screws, eh? And what's the probability that the screws will screw me, and I'll end up screwed myself? Yes, one too many online furniture purchases have made this dude a DIY pessimist.

For the optimists amongst you - and those ready to embark on a road trip / camping adventure in an RV have got to have some level of the trait - VanLab's conversion kit certainly seems like a gem. Or rather, an eco-friendly set of woodwork panels made from sustainable Birch Plywood.

The bow in this mini archery set don't shoot no stinkin' toothpicks. It comes with 10 real metal arrows, secured into polyester drill rods, that can fly up to 50 feet when released from the 5.5" x 2.4" metal and elastic fiber launcher.

Not surprisingly, the Mini Archery Bow & Arrow Set comes with a suggested minimum age for use. Surprisingly, that age is 12, not 40. With 3 written references stating you have never appeared on Jackass, or been a contender for a Darwin Award.

J'accuse! this humanoid ring and its opal eyes that actually blink of...being awesome. Made by Levon Kevorkian and sold through his Internal Affairs jewelry studio, The Accuser Ring will tell everyone you meet that your eyes are, in fact, down here.

The head, which I believe is modeled after Ronan the Accuser from the Marvel Comics Universe, is made of .925 sterling silver. Its fluttering eyelids cover your choice of cut black, black forest, fire, hot pink, blood, or azure opal.

The Tow Hitch Multi-Tool from Rockworkx isn't just a multi-tool itself, it makes a multi-tool out of your tow hitch. The 2" receiver of any vehicle can now both tow trailers, RVs, and sporting goods racks and store a 7-in-1 multi-tool for camping, 4x4 off-roading, and other outdoor adventures. And, now that I think of it, hide your keys and cash, and set you up with a stripper pole.

The Tow Hitch Multi-Tool, or Rockworkx T7, has 7 primary functions: hardened aluminum sand and snow shovel; hammer with peg / nail puller; spanner; wood axe (Long and short handle); adze axe / hoe; camp stool; and full-size tow hitch step.

A few years ago I wrote about 20 items I bought on Amazon and would buy 100 times again, providing you dudes and ladies with invaluable information on how to improve you own lives by purchasing a bunch of sh*t. And now, I'm back with more, baby! 15 more items I bought and would buy 100 times again. (They're all also available on Amazon, but my titles have a character limit so I had to leave that part out.)

"Frame" is the word to note in these Tiny Home Frame Kits made by PLUS 1. Buy one from Home Depot, and you won't receive a complete tiny home in a box, which is what I would want. And if they could somehow make it a pop-up that automatically assembles when you open the lid, like the greeting cards, that would be even better. PLUS 1 kits consist only of the steel stud framing, plus some calcs, plans, hardware, and instructions, you'll need to build one of their two dozen wee abodes. The rest of it - the doors and windows, the siding, the plumbing and electrical components - is sold separately.

Fortunately, PLUS 1 notes, it's all sold separately through Home Depot, the same preferred provider of the Tiny Home Frame Kits themselves, so it's at least one-stop shopping for lucky you. And even more revenue for lucky Home Depot!

Tekto's new A5 Spry shows its spryness in more ways than just the lickety split deployment of its automatic blade. The knife also comes in your choice of Dagger, Drop Point, or Tanto styles, all made with S35VN steel, and fitted into a textured Black or OD Green handle.

Regardless of which blade and colorway you choose, Tekto says the A5 Spry is their "most tactical knife." Complementing its ultra-fast automatic blade release is a contoured push button that's easy to settle into and activate, and a handle whose embossed line design is made to provide an iron grip. The A5 Spry is also compact and lightweight - 4.9" when closed 3.49 ounces - despite the raw power it endeavors to unleash in action.

Gosun shoots for the moon with their Elcat Solar Electric Boat. Created with a focus on clean energy products for the outdoors, Gosun started out small. Solar ovens. Portable solar panels. Electric coolers. But in the 8 or so years since I've been paying attention, both their ambitions and their products have grown quite a bit. In addition to being able to glide up to 6 adults across their favorite body of water, the 15' x 8' Gosun Elcat is "one of the world's most energy efficient boats."

The Elcat is powered by a 1.3 kW electric motor and 1.3kWH battery battery that recharges via grid or solar power. It also comes with solar panels able to provide an additional 200 watts of power, extending a range Gosun says can already last all day at trolling speeds. (Top speed is 6MPH.)

What do you get when you combine a toaster, an external hard drive, and a 1990s Kodak camera? Nothing. But add some wheels, handlebars, and a seat, and voila! You've got Honda's new Motocompacto all-electric scooter!

The Motocompacto is a nod to Honda's early-80s folding microscooter, the Motocompo. Like its predecessor, the Motocompacto is easy to pack into a compact brick that fits in your car and stores in small spaces. Its folded dimensions are 3.7" wide x 21.1" tall x 29.2" long. At just 41.3 pounds, it's also fairly easy to lug the scooter up a few steps, and bring it with you onto public transport.

With its wee 1.63" length and mighty mite cutting capabilities, this miniature pocket knife looks fun, dude. So why the H-E-Double-Tanto-Blade is it called FUNBRO? Absolute hogwash. It should be the FUNDUDE Miniature Pocket Knife.

Or maybe I should just make my own teeny-tiny 26-gram folder and name it that.

Neville Boston calls metal license plates "a 19th century feature of 21st century life." Boston is the co-founder of Reviver, a company that has launched digital license plates called RPlates, in an effort to make your vehicle's nametags as modern and tech-savvy as the vehicle itself.

My first thought upon seeing the words "RPlate Digital License Plates" is that we have a new and improved take on the 007 Motorized License Plate Masks. A smartphone-controlled system that allows you to project whatever clever personalization, or police-evading faux state numbers and registration, you want. But while RPlate is a platform that connects your vehicle to your phone, it's not going to let you tell the driver behind you "GORAMS," "URHOT," or "FCKOFF." And it's not going to help you dodge the law.

As overrun as our kitchens - and our oceans too, probably - are with cooking gadgets, I still think there's room in the drawer for the Flegg. It's a silicone egg ring that allows the chef to flip and serve fried eggs easy-peasy, with no broken yolks, no misplacements on the plate, and no unwanted encounters with the countertop or floor.

Here's one of the best lightbulb moments of 2023, the Edison Light Stick from Barebones. Vintage-inspired and made of brass and copper, the company calls their outdoor lantern-flashlight combo a "completely unique collector's item." I'm not sure I'd go that far, but between its cylindrical shell and spiraling LED rope winding 'round the inside, the compact camping light is indeed totally tubular.

Put yourself on the receiving end of some road rage with the FLIK of your wrist middle finger car windshield light. The FLIK is a partly funny, all the way horrible gadget drivers can install on the backs of their vehicles to practice, as Maverick would say, "communication" with other drivers.

Technically, these 14-Inch Industrial Grade Glow Sticks are made for camping, power outages, and emergencies, but I know you dudes take one look at them and think the same thing I do: Schvrmmmmmmm! Kwishuuuuuuuuuu! Let the lightsaber battles begin! Anyone got an extra SaberForge hilt then can lend me?

Those not looking for their next survival kit accessory or Star Wars gift can also use these 14-inch green glowing monsters to bring some big stick energy to their next show or festival.

Support your local artisans, your Mom & Pop shops, your independent businesspeople just trying to keep their storefronts alive in the face of corporate death-dealing, your...Thirsty Goose Portable Men's Urinal, eager to drink your pee as you stand in line for 2 hours to get a Croiss-ice Cream Cone at a local bakery that went viral on TikTok last week.

(Yes, a Croiss-ice Cream Cone is a croissant spun in the shape of an ice cream cone, and filled with soft-serve. And yes, it's a real thing.)

While men's travel urinals are no novelty anymore, Thirsty Goose has certainly found a way to make a fairly standard product for camping, road trips, and people who don't feel like getting out of bed to take a wee novel again. It's kind of like what the Puking Kitty Gravy Boat did for gravy boats.