14 Condiments & Toppings You May Just Eat On Their Own
These 14 condiments and toppings will make you want to grab a steak. Or a cupcake. Some chicken. Some waffles. Some chicken & waffles. Ice cream, tacos, burgers, fries...what, your belly don't have room for all that?
OK, then. Just grab a spoon. After all, these 14 condiments and toppings are so tempting and so delicious, you may end up just eating them on their own.
Note: Condiments and toppings prices are marked as they were at printing on December 18, 2022. Prices, and availability, are subject to change.
Old Bay Hot Sauce
McCormick recommends dumping Old Bay Hot Sauce into your chili, soups, and stews. I'd think shrimp and oysters, fresh or fried, would be pretty high on the list too. And if you're planning a DIY Hot Sauce Challenge for New Year's Eve or halftime at next year's Super Bowl party, Old Bay has now got you covered there too.
Runamok Maple Sparkle Syrup
Ooooh, Runamok's Maple Sparkle Syrup is definitely on the list of magical goos Glinda the Good Witch and a unicorn would make during their Zoom cooking sessions together. And then the Wicked Witch of the West and Smaug would tear through their houses and steal it all as Sarah Jessica Parker from Hocus Pocus stood by yelling, Amok, amok, amok! Sorry, kids, no glitter pancakes or waffles for you.
Freeze-Dried Dill Pickles
Freeze-Dried Dill Pickles are poppable, crunchable, addictive, and ready to desiccate your body and burn a whole through your esophagus when you end up eating the equivalent of 4 jars of regular pickles in a single sitting.
I mean, a single 0.7-ounce bag of Freeze-Dried Dill Pickles has to contain, like, a month's worth of sodium, and enough vinegar to remove the rust on every piece of scrap metal in the junkyard.
Maybe just throw a crunchy few on your burger instead.
Rye Whiskey Caramel Sauce
Made by Seattle's Hot Cakes Molten Chocolate Cakery, Rye Whiskey Caramel Sauce is an ice cream / brownie / waffle / spoon topper made with Old Overholt Rye Whiskey and organic cream. If you dared me, I'd probably even dip my fried chicken in it.
Dare me. Please dare me.
The Bacon Jams
Bacon jam is kind of like peanut butter: intended as a spread or topping, but inevitably eaten by the spoonful standing at the kitchen counter. Preserved pork advocates The Bacon Jams are happy to oblige either method of consumption with their multi-flavored jars of the delectable meat crack.
Cinnamon Toast Crunch Frosting
Cinnamon Toast Crunch Frosting, eh? One of the Top 5 cereals ever made turned into an tub of icing, eh? Yeah. There's no way this vat of cinnamon-kissed fat and sugar is going anywhere but on a spoon ride straight to my mouth.
Fly By Jing Sichuan Chili Crisp
Open your mind - and numb your mouth - to the hot umami bomb that is Fly By Jing Sichuan Chili Crisp. Made in Chengdu by Sichuan chef Jing Gao, this condiment is an oil-based cornucopia of flavor and texture they say is good on everything from dumplings and dandan noodles to eggs and ice cream. Hmmm. I'll go, yum, yum, yum, and ewww.
Fire Syrup - Jalapeno Infused Syrup
The makers of Fire Syrup, a jalapeno-infused sweetener and flavor kicker upper, call their creation "A sweet, hot squirt of genius with 104 uses!"
Bet they stole that line from the catalogue at a sperm bank.
Fire Syrup is drizzle-ready for any food or drink that needs some sweet heat to take it to the next level, or just make it memorable. Think fried chicken. Lemonade and margaritas. Grilled peaches and dense chocolate brownies. Mmmm, Fire-Syrup-slathered pancakes and bacon. It's also gift-ready for anyone who, like itself, is hot, but sweet, but hot.
Culinary Perfume - Edible Fragrance & Ice Cream Topping
It's gonna cost you a helluva lot more than hot fudge, sprinkles, and Old Spice, but Salt & Straw's Culinary Perfume, an edible fragrance and ice cream topping, is sure to be the foodie gift of the year.
Culinary Perfumes are a collaboration between ice cream darling Salt & Straw and fragrance brand Imaginary Authors, which specializes in scents with "a compelling storyline peppered with intriguing twists." A Cloud of Cocoa, A Swoon of Citrus, and A Plume of Blossoms Culinary Perfumes are edible sprays intended both for spritzing over scoops of frozen treats, and licking off as you eat; and spraying on your favorite perfume-responsive body parts...and perhaps letting someone else lick off as they eat.
Twix Shakers Seasoning Blend
Twix Bars pulverized into a seasoning blend of chocolate, caramel, and cookie? Uh, can the Twix Shakers Seasoning Blend run in 2024? It might not know much about the economy, the law, the world in general, but what politician does these days? At least one thing's for certain: the Twix Shakers Seasoning Blend has a better chance than any human being of filling the chasm between parties (with a delectable blend of sandy sweetness) and uniting us in love (of food) and purpose (eating a lot of it) once again.
Edible Food Crayons Seasonings & Condiments
Edible Crayons? Edible Crayons?! Everything my mama taught me as a kid - namely, what she taught me not to eat - is going out the window. Joining Edible Birthday Candles and Edible Printer Paper, we now have Food Crayons, creative seasonings and condiments for "coloring" dishes and drinks packed into everyone's favorite childhood (and adult!) coloring tool.
Momofuku Ssam Sauce
"Tastes good on everything!" Normally when a condiment makes such a claim I'm skeptical, but this condiment is Momofuku Ssam Sauce. Made by chef David Chang, founder of the Momofuku Korean-inspired restaurants, and really a whole culinary brand, this is some Momofuk-in' ssam good stuff. It really does taste good on everything. Meat. Rice. Ramen. Eggs. Pizza. The palm of your hand.
Bees Knees Spicy Honey
I'm not sure I can wrap my head around the implications - the glorious, glorious implications - of what essentially amounts to the honey bear being left alone with the Sriracha rooster in a kitchen cabinet for too long. Bees Knees Honey is a chili-infused spicy honey that can sub in for anything from hot sauce to Hershey's Syrup.
Argentinian Dulce de Leche
Amongst all the cows Argentina is known for converting to internationally-renowned ribs and steaks there must be a few they keep around and milk for converting into what is apparently also internationally-renowned dulce de leche. Literally translated as "candy of milk", this dairy concoction consists of cow juice, sugar, and vanilla, and basically tastes like caramel.