SCOUT Carbon Paramotor

Posted: March 21, 2014
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The SCOUT, a combination of carbon fiber and mandrel bent aluminum, heralds itself the world's most advanced paramotor. I have no reason not to believe it. Not that I'd never seen or heard of any kind of paramotor prior to my SCOUT introduction, but, you know, why would it lie? For those as paramotoring clueless as I was, the activity basically entails mounting an engine and parachute on your back and tooling around open fields like a low-flying bird. It's similar to paragliding, with the obvious addition of a motor and subtraction of jumping off a cliff. For instant visuals, fast-forward to about 1:15 in the above video.

I'm not sure how easy paramotors are to steer and control (the evidence suggests iffiness) but if they could perfect the process and establish a constant flying height of, say 30 to 50 feet, would paramotoring not be a fantastic, traffic-and-other-human-being-free form of transportation? I could literally fly to work. Cars, stoplights, construction, bodies of water: Hasta la vista, Gilipollas! Me cago en todo lo que se menea!

SCOUT paramotor power comes courtesy of a 54-pound Vittorazi Moster engine with output capabilities of 25.5HP. It is the only paramotor currently incorporating dynamic torque effect compensation (DTEC), which cancels out engine and prop torque, and ensures level flight without pilot input. DTEC also enables calibrated handling and turning around pylons (ah, so my visions of the perfect commute may not be so far off after all.) Additional unique features include built-in safe start technology to improve pilot safety while handling the unit on the ground, a fully aerodynamic and lightweight carbon fiber composite cage, and an adjustable propeller.

The SCOUT paramotor is intended only for highly experienced Powered Paragliding & Paramotoring pilots, and all purchasers must be US residents. To ensure people who have no business using a SCOUT do not buy one, one of Jeff Bezos' drones will trail all paramotor deliveries to take a photograph of required licensing. Those who cannot produce the proper documents will be punished either with a bucket of green slime or an atomic wedgie.

Read more about the SCOUT carbon paramotor here; to purchase, follow the Amazon link below.

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